The Social Network: Friend or Foe

By N.C. Forbes

I, like countless of others have become part of the social network phenomenon.  It has become a common thread to which both young and old can relate.  The reason behind why we have all jumped on the social network bandwagon varies from person to person. For some it’s to reconnect with childhood friends or long lost family. For others, it may be to find old loves, network for business or simply just to keep in touch with people we don’t get much time to talk to, due to our fast paced lifestyles. Then there are the people that use these sites as their personal version of e-harmony, as many take a whirl at love or lust through these social networks.

Don’t get me wrong I, like many live in a time where people are constantly on the move.  Between work, school, families, and a host of other responsibilities, it makes it difficult to keep in touch in the conventional ways. Email, social sites and even texting has changed the way we communicate drastically. However, with the ability to get in touch with people at our fingertips, why is it that in ways we have become more distant, and in fact less social.  Ponder for a minute, how many times have you seen two people at dinner yet checking their cell phones for a BBM (blackberry messenger), text, or hit from one of the many social networks.  It has become so important to see what the next message will be that people check it while driving, in school, or even in church.  And even I have been guilty of a few of these on occasions. But this is my point exactly, if we are spending so much time checking the next message, how much time are we really enjoying the moments right in front of us? How much “quality” is in the times we spend with our friends and family if we are constantly waiting for that next beep, ring or PING! to occur.  Has the act of becoming more social, limited our relationships with others? Have our relationships merely become superficial due to the quick, convenient ways to keep in touch?  In many ways they have!  It has become normal for us to send a quick, “hello” via text, rather than pick up the phone. It’s nothing to look on a social site to see an old friend, instead of planning a lunch date to catch up.  Even courtship, has changed due to these social networks. People arrange dates and get to know one another sometimes with never even picking up the phone.  If you had to actually tally up the amount of time spent texting or surfing these sites, you may actually be appalled. In the amount of time we spend on the social networks in a day, week, or month; we could have accomplished something much more important. 



Don’t take me as a social network basher, I think facebook, BBM, ovoo, myspace, kik, twitter, etc.; have their place. I just feel that in an effort to keep people current in our lives, we have stopped smelling the roses! We spend so much time updating our statuses that we fail to realize the status that we have actually made for ourselves.  We have become dependent on these networks as counselor when were mad at the ex who did us wrong, as friend when we have good news to share, and as doctor when we need advice about what cures a cold fast. We announce to the world our status and forget the people right next to us who would love to see us, to listen and to help.  So, is the social network, friend or foe? It depends on your approach, I guess.  It can be a glass that is half empty or half full. Whatever your view, just remember that when you log off, that real life is there waiting for you to log in…that will be your ultimate status update.  What will yours say?